Friday, January 3, 2014
25 Things I Learned in 2013
1. I still hate pineapple on pizza. I gave it a solid effort – but no go. Fruit does not belong on pizza
2. Bacon cures most things.
3. Life is short. And the moments that matter are usually the ones we don’t even recognize.
4. Although bloody cold, in a “your-skin-can-freeze-in-seconds, you-have-brain-freeze-from-the-outside and you-can’t-breathe- through-your-nose-because-your-nose-hairs-are-frozen-together” – At least its sunny and freezing in Alberta
5. I know I should have learned this back in elementary, but don’t put your keys in your mouth in -30 temperatures. Your tongue will stick to them.
6. Few things are more awkward than having a stranger rap to you in a public place.
7. Getting lost driving in the country is a cure for most things. If that doesn’t work – try bacon.
8. Coffee = Life
9. I’ve inherited a second family that primarily wears navy blue. Its like 150 brothers that I never knew I wanted…
10. You can’t pick your family – but in the rare cases you can I’d pick the ones I currently have – and the crazy ones I’ve picked up along the way.
11. Hospitals should have bars/pubs or whiskey dispensers
12. If residing in a hospital for whatever reason these are the things you need to know: the meat is a mystery – don’t eat it. Ice water and heated blankets make things more bearable - and if you encounter a pillow. Hang onto it for dear life. It’s like contraband heaven in sterile hell.
13. People are bat shit crazy
14. Referring to #13. I’m serious. If I’m not getting stabbed with a pen, getting accosted in parking lots by hutterite men trying to sell me pies - or getting human remains delivered to me – its just not a normal day. And it has nothing to do with a full moon.
15. If you think you’re having a bad day – remember that there is a homeless person out there in -30 with shoes ductaped together who would love to have the problems you currently do.
16. Don’t let yourself be an excuse for someone’s unhappiness or failed relationships. Its not worth it. They may not think so – but you are worth so much more than that. Also – sometimes “I’m single” can also mean “I’m engaged and a really good liar”
17. If someone goes into a crazy story that is strangely identical to a James Bourne movie, it is possible they are crazy… and you should slowly back away…
18. I thought I had outgrown my awkwardness/clumsiness. Reality set in when I walked into the wall...
19. When someone shows you who they are – believe them. Good or bad.
20. My heart thinks its batman. However I do not have a batmobile and it mostly just hurts. A lot.
21. Taser Fridays should be a thing…
22. The moments you get to just “be” with someone, talking about nothing, or laughing or drinking in the people you love – is truly priceless.
23. Sometimes happiness is warm socks, lucky charms and being cuddled up on the couch
24. I don’t like running. If I’m running you should run too because most likely something is chasing me.
25. I’m really glad 2013 is over – and I’m excited that it’s a new year. Not in a “I’m going to make resolutions” type of way. But just this year was CRAZY! Good and bad, but fresh starts, new memories and new chapters are ahead and I’m excited :)