Monday, March 21, 2011

A Case of the Mondays

Lets talk about Mondays.
I had a perfectly wonderful weekend, dancing, sleeping, wine, long baths, movies – and then BAM!I am violently awakened by an obnoxious off beat beeping intruding upon my dreams.
I incoherently hit my snooze button exactly 4 times, now pushing me on the verge of being late for work, or being on time with half hazard hair and uneven eyeliner.

I stumble around my kitchen, with only one eye open because the other refuses to be awake yet. I open the cupboard that holds the coffee grinder and much to my utter horror, is MISSING. Because of my great surprise I stumble backwards falling into the kitchen table and landing on my butt in the middle of the kitchen. Now mostly awake, I realize that I hold in my hand – the said missing coffee grinder.

My next challenge is to successfully make the pot of coffee that will save my life. I somehow manage to grind, and place majority of the grounds in the coffee machine and I am elated. Yes. I am on the road to being awake.

The rest of the morning results in looking for missing pants, realizing that I tipped the bartender the change I put away for the bus, burning my ear on my curling iron and someone missing my face entirely while putting on makeup, but my hair blends perfectly into my face. Ugh.
I find my boots, grab my ipod, phone and keys and head out the door. A few near misses with cars, and minor profanities for those who don’t shovel their sidewalks and only a couple falls on my ass – I reach the bus stop in record time.

I now feel quite proud of my accomplishment once safely on the bus. In the middle of my smug feelings, I proudly walk off the bus, head held high with not doing anything horribly embarrassing– my thoughts are interrupted by a “excuse me miss… you forgot your purse on the bus…” which results in me running back, tripping on the doorway and grabbing it before I miss the second one.

Somehow, by the sheer grace of the universe I didn’t die this morning, and I am grateful. I apologize to whoever has to see my disaster hair or witnessed my brain-dead moments.
I hope to arrive safely back at home this evening, crawl into the bath tub with candle and a glass of wine, where hopefully I am not expected to use my brain.
Thankfully tomorrow is another day, and even better yet, tomorrow is not Monday.

1 comment:

Kathleen said...

this, THIS is the Vanessa I know and love :)